A Word About FEAR

Three-year-old Madie WANTED to have a good time at her birthday party, and I think she did. When she and her mom greeted me at the front door she was very happy and excited wearing a beautiful, bright party dress and a Dora the Explorer party hat. She said please and thank you and smiled a mile a minute.

Then the show started and Madie wasn't sure what to do. For the first few minutes she walked that fine line between laughter and tears - she even stepped up with the help of an older friend for the show opener - Magic Dust Bunnies. But then the tears finally won out a few minutes later - the birthday girl retreated to the safety of the big, comfy couch and a big person hug.

It should be said that none of the other kids were crying and the show went very well - everybody had fun, dad helped with the egg bag, another kid made a birthday cake, and, of course, Bubble the Pet Monkey Puppet killed.

This isn't the first time I have seen tears and fear from the birthday kid - and it is never about me or any other performer. It is about being the center of attention. Sometimes we don't realize that this great event of loved ones coming together to celebrate the life of a little person can be very stressful on the little person. It is not an every-day, common occurrence to have gifts and attention showered on us. Even as adults, accepting birthday wishes can at times be a little embarrassing and stressful.

Prepare for the FEAR and ATTENTION:

1. Prepare kids for what to expect and what is expected from them during the party. Remind them every day for a week ahead.
2. Take kids to see as many live performers as possible. Learning to be a good audience member is an important social skill
3. If hiring a performer - let him/her know about your child's personality. Will the birthday kid be comfortable with the attention? Will the birthday kid be willing to help-out during the show?
4. Schedule a performer at the beginning of the party - and let guests know so they can be on time. The longer into a party the more anxiety can build.
5. Hire Mr. G because he knows how to work with all kids.

Madie is only three and will have many, many more birthdays - they all deserve to be special with nothing to fear.